Martha the Flatulent steals the show! July 06, 2017 19:30
Not our breed, but this is top dog news! It is official; the new Ugliest Dog of the Year 2017 is Martha the Bull Mastiff! To say she “fought off the opposition” would be a stretch. She meandered on stage, flopped down, fell asleep and started snoring loudly. Really loudly. The crowd at the Sonoma-Marin Fair cheered.
Ok, featured here is A mastiff, not Martha, not allowed to use her actual pics for fear of being put in the Tower.
Meanwhile, the rest of the candidates hopped, slunk and wobbled as they were shown. Strangely most of them were Chinese crested sorts, including Icky, Rascal, Jake and Josie. The current ugly trend it seems is for one to have very few teeth so that one’s tongue lolls out of one’s mouth at all times. Mostly.
Martha, like most of her compatriots had been relinquished and put up for adoption with very little hope of a new family due to medical conditions, and frankly, looks. However, California girl Jessica Burkard saw Martha as the ideal companion for her St. Bernard. “She’s a darling!” said she. “She’s a train wreck!” said her father.
In second place came Moe, a Brussels Griffon Pug mix. Still going fairly strongly though deaf and blind at the amazing age of 16! There was a British showing too, Chase a fourteen-year-old Chinese Crested Harke mix took third prize having come all the way from Neath in South Wales! She sported a Welsh flag and red white and green toenails. Well, you would wouldn’t you?
The guy above also took part in a previous competition, gotta love him. Martha has an uncontrollable drool, droopy red eyes, excessively baggy skin and the ability to create a lot of gas. She can’t sleep in mummy’s room as her snoring is so loud. Her mummy tells her everyday how beautiful she is. And they all lived happily ever after! It’s a good news story and we love it.